Today I'm feeling even more trapped. It's been a week today since I was very ill and the memories aren't going to leave me alone. I keep thinking that everyday I get away from the last time I was sick the closer I am to the next. My dreams were about vomit all night apart from the part where Angel was awake and I was panicking that she was awake because she was feeling ill.
I'd wanted to go out to the postbox at least this morning but, here I am still at home, feeling weak, edgy and dizzy while T has stopped his work to take Angel out to get my meds.
I don't know how to get back from here, how to heal after the big bad happened. I swore that next time I got a tummy bug I would kill myself. So why am I still here? Stuck in what feels like lonely empty scary limbo.
The truth is I dont want to leave T and Angel but at the moment I'm living a half life with no idea how to change it.
No comments:
Post a Comment